2001-12-10, 10:04 p.m.,

i nearly lost it last night, katelyn and i argued fiercely for what seemed like forever, so i did the only thing i could think of, i curled up on the sofa with my big comfy blanket, pulled the blanket over my head with the phone underneath and called her. The moment i heard her voice i lost it, just bawled like a baby. I just dont understand how she can make me so happy and people who care about me and supposedly want me to be happy find faults in it, telling me i'm crazy and that it wont work. who cares? i want to go, i need to be with her i need to make it work as best as i can and if it doesnt it doesnt but it was my decision and i'll deal with it, it my life, my experiences, my lessons. Why cant they accept that i'm happy and be happy for me? I just want to talk to anie so badly and see if she got the same hell from everyone when she went away.

Maxine, knowing just what to do in the midst of my tears and overly emotional outpours picks up her guitar and sings for me, not one song but two. I cant tell you what she means to me, how much i love her, how just her voice heals absolutelty everything. No one has ever sang to me on the phone. Do i deserve her? absolutely not, but i'd die beofore letting her go again.

I havent been happy since the moment our hands slipped from each others at the airport and i wont be happy until i hold onto her as she comes off the plane......12 days and conting...

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- - 2007-06-08
My absenteeism - 2007-05-24
Defining Yourself - 2007-03-19
odd sort of flatness - 2007-03-06
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