2003-11-13, 11:03 a.m.,

Yesterday I went out to lunch with one of the girls here at work...hmm let me start again actually.

Aside from Geek Girl (GG) who workd with me here in the office and talks about nothing but The Matrix and Star Wars and the philosophical and religious contexts within both storylines, I work with a small "Gaggle" of women. I use the term gagggle because that is exactly what they are, a moderate sized group of birds all travelling around the office in a small pack like geese or pidgeons pecking at things...gossiping about each other, admiring the clothing another is wearing, comparing handbags, checking each other's make up and falling into the Bridget Jones world of "Why oh why am I still single?" self pity.

A few days ago I had a tragic thought and that was "Why can't I work with normal girls who want to have conversations about things other than their boyfriends and makeup tips and where to buy this seasons most fashionable shoes and handbags." and it dawned on me and suddenly I became very very frightened. These girls are normal and I'm the outsider. me. I'm the freak here aren't I?

Oh yes, anyway, there's one girl I go to lunch with everyday and I think I just enjoy the novelty of her Naivety. She so very sheltered and in a way I think I find it terribly cute. Yesterday while we were talking I could just sense the conversation steering int he direction of her trying to set me up with one of her boyfriends friends. So I had to tell her. At first she didn't understand when I told her that Maxie was my girlfriend. Not my female friend, but my girlfriend. Now she gets it and I'm sensing she's seeing me as some sort of fashion accessory now. As if she's uncovered some little treasure about the underworld no one else knows about.....I'm being subjected to question after question after curiousity....it's actually precious in a weird way. She's like a kid who's found her father's porn mag and even though she's slightly shy, embarrassed and reserved about being inquistive, she just can't help herself.

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